Issue : Imposter Syndrome
No matter what the evidence, the fear of rejection and the feeling of not belonging is among the most powerful of stories we tell ourselves. To fight these feelings, you might end up working harder, holding yourself to even higher standards, eventually risking burnout without diluting the fear.
Common Signs : Imposter Syndrome
Feeling like a fraud. Comparing yourself to others. Waiting to be told you don’t belong here. Imposter syndrome is on the rapid increase and the impact on you can be severe.
It is also an issue that arises in different scenarios too. For example:
- Work – success is not a result of your ability and working hard but just lucky or undeserved. This leads to pressure to prove yourself against impossible standards.
- Home – uncertain, inexperienced and unprepared for certain situations, such as getting married, being a provider or parenting. The fear of getting it wrong or not meeting expectations (usually self-imposed) can paralyze.
- Learning – At school or at work we hold back avoiding sharing ideas in case they are rejected or show supposed ignorance. This can torpedo growth and innovation.
- Relationships – Feeling unworthy of another’s affection. Too scared to explain your needs. Stuck with a perception and that their partner seems them as ordinary.
Tackling it : Imposter Syndrome
Tackling imposter syndrome is difficult. It involves looking at the identity we have created for ourselves. The feelings themselves push us toward isolation and ultimately the voices of shame grow, as they do in dark places.